If I Owned an Apartment Complex...

• Loud music would get you evicted.
• If dogs were allowed, dog shit on the grass would get you evicted.
• There'd be more than one washing machine/dryer per building.
• You'd be required to stay with your laundry until it was finished.
• The management would actually care about your complaints.
• I'd do something about the water pressure.
• There'd be more parking spaces.
• No ridiculously loud parties.
• Oh yeah, no college students.
• No smoking!

Some of that sounds discriminatory, doesn't it? Well, I bet I'd have a huge waiting list.