CL: Tourist Season Alert from B.T.E.S.M.P

Attention all New Yorkers. The Bureau to Eradicate Slow-Moving People (i.e., tourists) is warning all New Yorkers that Tourist Season will hit New York hard in the next few weeks. This service advisory extends until New Year’s Eve; New Yorkers are to proceed with their daily lives with caution, especially if they live and/or work in the following areas: Penn Station, 34th Street and Herald Square, Times Square, Rockefeller Center, Fifth Avenue, Christopher Street, SoHo, and Broadway between Union Square and Canal Street. The aforementioned people flock to New York from the following places: New Jersey, Long Island, Texas, North Dakota, Italy, Japan, and England.

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Posted by Cameron Barrett at May 24, 2003 01:00 AM