If I Owned an Apartment Complex…

  • Loud music would get you evicted.
  • If dogs were allowed, dog shit on the grass would get you evicted.
  • There’d be more than one washing machine/dryer per building.
  • You’d be required to stay with your laundry until it was finished.
  • The management would actually care about your complaints.
  • I’d do something about the water pressure.
  • There’d be more parking spaces.
  • No ridiculously loud parties.
  • Oh yeah, no college students.
  • No smoking!

Some of that sounds discriminatory, doesn’t it? Well, I bet I’d have a huge waiting list.

Posted by Cameron Barrett at April 23, 1998 11:59 PM

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